May 21, 2008 05:51 pm
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“I’m seventeen, and I’m crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane.”
The other day, while reflecting on my teen years, I remembered this phrase from Ray Bradbury’s “Fahrenheit 451,” and I realized that when I was a teenager, I did a lot of really stupid and dangerous things. It probably seemed like I was crazy to my parents, but in reality I was just being a teen.
Of course, it’s tempting to think adolescence is a period of temporary insanity. How else do you explain young people who don’t seem to grasp the dangers of driving too fast, driving drunk, having unprotected sex, experimenting with drugs and binge drinking? Do they think they are invincible?
Well, in a study from the University of California, San Francisco, it was shown that adolescents are very well aware of their vulnerability and that they are actually more likely than adults to overestimate their risk of suffering negative effects from activities like drunk driving and unprotected sex.
The study found that teens are able to rationally consider the risks of a dangerous situation, but they also tend to weigh the benefits more heavily than adults. I know this was true when I was a teen, as I would rather risk my life in order to be cool than to be safe and risk social rejection.
Because of this reality, it is important for parents to provide protection for their teens. Of course, this can be a troublesome task as teens are no longer children but not yet adults, and simultaneously need boundaries and demand independence. If parents choose to be too controlling, teens will not receive the necessary experience they need to make healthy decisions as adults. But at the same time, if parents provide too much freedom too soon, teens will have greater opportunity for risk-taking and less guidance about how to properly weigh the consequences and benefits of their choices.
In other words, young teenagers need to be protected from themselves by removing opportunities for risk-taking. To do this, parents can fill portions of their teenager’s time with positive activities like church youth groups, Young Life, Boys and Girls Club and The Bridge. Through these organizations, teens can gain a feeling of independence by being away from parents while also being supervised by trusted adults.
Parents also need to prevent teens from being put into risky situations that can be tempting. This includes recognizing that teens should not be left alone at home with their boyfriend or girlfriend and that responsible adults should always be present at teen parties.
When I was a teen, my mom would always say, “I love you, be safe,” when I’d leave the house, and I would respond, “Don’t worry about me, I’m a teenager. I’m invincible!”
In truth, I knew I was actually very vulnerable to dangers to my health and my future. Unfortunately, for many teens, the long-term consequences of activities like drug use and sex don’t always seem as serious as being thought uncool by friends or being dumped by a boyfriend. Because of this, parents need to understand that adolescence isn’t a period of temporary insanity that teens will grow out of but instead a critical transition that requires protecting teens from these risky situations while also teaching them about consequences and supporting them with independence.
By doing this, you can accomplish the primary role of parents: raising healthy, responsible adults.
Mat Anderson is the staff writer and research specialist at The Bridge in Joplin. For more information visit futureparadigm.org.
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