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Discussion

March 24, 2011

Time to talk? Think before giving kids mobile phones

By Joe Hadsall Globe Features Editor

JOPLIN, Mo. — First lost tooth. First day of school. First time staying at home alone. Technology has given children another historic rite of passage: First mobile phone.

But how does a parent know when his or her child is really ready for a mobile phone? Assessing that decision is no different than other landmarks of maturity, said Mindy Miller, a licensed clinical social worker for Applied Psychological Services.

“There seems to be no minimum age,” Miller said. “Granted, I don’t see the purpose of giving a 6-year-old a mobile phone. It’s determined by their level of activity.”

Miller said the first thing parents should do is know the difference between a mobile phone and a smartphone. Where mobile phones provide basic communication abilities, a smartphone can be just as powerful as an Internet-connected computer.

That means a kid should probably have a mobile phone first, she said.

Some phone manufacturers make models specifically for younger children. Equipped with no number keys, parents can preprogram a few phone numbers and maintain strict control over call times.

No matter how old an intended recipient is, however, Miller said that phones can be expensive. That means guidelines and responsibilities should be set.

“I lost every coat my parents gave me, so I’m glad I don’t have a phone on my conscience,” Miller said. “If you give a child something like that and expect them to carry it, be prepared for them to lose it.”

Questions to ask

Parents considering phones for children should ask themselves:

• What do the kids need the phone for? Maybe a child is active with sports or other activities, and he has a clear need for such a device. Or maybe kids see their friends with phones, and want to be like them. Maybe they want to talk to or text their friends regularly.

Whatever the need, it’s important to determine it, Miller said.

• What rules should be set? Should a child be talking at 2 a.m. with friends? What happens to the phone at school, where there are usually strict rules against bringing them out?

Miller said a phone can be a great privilege that can be removed as a disciplinary measure, if necessary.

“Parents need to have the ability to take them away,” Miller said. “It becomes a good consequence.”

• Will using the phone exclude other activities? If a kid gets a phone and becomes glued to it in such a way that healthy habits change to more sedentary ones, then even more limits should be set.

“It’s just like a computer or PlayStation,” Miller said. “If a kid is playing ‘Angry Birds’ on a phone when he used to be kicking a ball outside, then that’s not good."

Smartphone savvy

The level of parental attention increases when smartphones enter the picture. Many of those phones can easily connect to the Internet, including social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and MySpace.

Parents who set up careful controls on home computers may find all that protection going out the window with the right smartphone, Miller said.

“If you have a computer set up at a central location, so you can look over their shoulders, you can’t do that with a phone,” Miller said.

Devices such as the iPhone, BlackBerry and Droid also get flashed around like status symbols, Miller said. Additionally, they come equipped with cameras and microphones, which enable trends that didn’t exist years ago, such as sexting and cyber-bullying.

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