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Published January 01, 2009 07:42 pm - OK, it’s not as depressing as watching the National Football League’s Pro Bowl game. But it’s close. Watching the NFL Pro Bowl game is depressing for two reasons. The first reason, of course, is because it’s the NFL Pro Bowl where, for some reason, everyone — including the players — wears a Hawaiian shirt.
Mike Pound: Ritual leads to case of holiday depression
By Mike Pound
Globe columnist
mpound@joplinglobe.com
OK, it’s not as depressing as watching the National Football League’s Pro Bowl game.
But it’s close.
Watching the NFL Pro Bowl game is depressing for two reasons. The first reason, of course, is because it’s the NFL Pro Bowl where, for some reason, everyone — including the players — wears a Hawaiian shirt. It’s as if the idea is to convey to everyone watching: “Look at us. We’re in Hawaii.”
I don’t get the whole wearing-Hawaiian-shirts-in-Hawaii thing anyway. I mean, I like Hawaiian shirts. I wear them a lot. But I don’t think I would wear them in Hawaii. I think that would be sort of redundant.
The second reason why watching the NFL Pro Bowl game is depressing is because it signifies the end of the football season, and therefore the end of spending Sunday afternoons with my family in our basement watching football on TV. And by family, I mean our dog, Shilo, because, let’s face it, my wife and our 10-year-old daughter, Emma, couldn’t care less about watching football on TV.
Me: Hey, look. The Chiefs just fumbled.
Wife: That’s nice.
Me: Hey, look. The Chiefs just gave up a touchdown.
Emma: That’s nice.
Me: Hey, look. The Chiefs just won the game.
Wife and Emma: You’re lying.
Sure, there is always college basketball to watch, and I love college basketball, but it’s just not the same. So, for me, watching the Pro Bowl is as depressing as watching Cher trying to change facial expressions.
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