• 

  City wants to buy weather radios for those without

  Phil Jones had been working on a construction project outside his house all day on May 22 and was unaware that a tornado watch had been issued. Once he was inside, though, his weather radio went off, and he learned that a warning had been issued.

Local News

Search Results

Close Previous Now showing: of Next

Previous Next Close

Discussion

July 18, 2008

Mike Pound: A Bratz lawsuit? KA-CHING!!!!

Anonymous The Joplin Globe Fri Jul 18, 2008, 06:33 PM CDT

By Mike Pound

Globe columnist

mpound@joplinglobe.com

I may have struck it rich and for that I thank the Mattel toy company.

See, I heard that the folks over at Mattel just won some sort of lawsuit against MGA Entertainment. This is big news.

See, the folks at Mattel make Barbie dolls and the folks at MGA make Bratz dolls. Now, whenever the folks at Mattel and the folks at MGA do anything it is big news to anyone who is the parent of a female-type person.

You know how big the story about Anheuser-Busch being sold was to guys ... well, to guys like me? Well, news stories about Mattel and MGA are just as big to parents of female-type persons.

Apparently, and this is only based on what I heard on NPR Friday morning on the drive to work, what happened is the Mattel folks sued the MGA folks. The Mattel folks claimed that somebody at MGA stole the idea for the Bratz dolls from them and apparently a judge agreed.

Personally, I’m not sure I would want many people to know that I came up with the idea for Bratz dolls. Mainly because, as far as I’m concerned, Bratz dolls are the oddest looking things I’ve ever seen. They have weird heads, weird hair and no feet. Seriously, if you take off a Bratz doll’s shoe all you’ll find is a nub which, to me, was always sort of unsettling.

But, aesthetics aside, Bratz dolls are worth big money to MGA. Apparently young girls, of a certain age, love Bratz dolls. And when Emma was of a certain age she loved them too. Now, of course, Emma thinks Bratz dolls are “kind of creepy.” But that’s now. “Every one. Really, really, really, I do need every one. Can I have them please, please, please, please?” is how Emma put it when she was of a certain age.

My wife and I are stern, sensible parents so we did not get Emma every Bratz doll. We got her most of them, but not every one of them. We also got Emma Bratz-doll accessories. Lots of them. I remember spending the better part of Christmas Day through New Year’s Eve trying to put together a Bratz doll limo that Emma got one Christmas.

Emma also used to like Barbie dolls at the same certain age. So at the same time she was getting just about every Bratz doll, she was also getting just about every Barbie doll and every Barbie-doll accessory. I once had to hire a team of engineers from MIT to come and help me put together the Barbie doll rock-star stage. After a week they gave up and went back to Boston.

I’m only mentioning this because on NPR they said that Mattel could win a lot of money from MGA. The NPR people said MGA may have to turn over all the Bratz-doll royalties to Mattel. When I heard the NPR people say that, one thought ran through my head. That one thought was: KA-CHING!!!

See, the way I figure it, as a loyal purchaser of roughly 294 Barbies and 394 Bratz dolls, I deserve a piece of that royalty action.

Strictly from a straight-up monetary standpoint, I think Mattel owes me plenty. I put my expenses at $4.9 million.

And I think that’s a conservative estimate.

Now, I also think I have some money coming to me for emotional pain and suffering. Has anyone ever tried to open a package containing either a Barbie or Bratz doll? If you haven’t, imagine you are a Democratic member of Congress trying to open a White House e-mail. That’s how tough it is to open a Barbie- or Bratz-doll package. And that’s not even counting the pain and suffering associated with trying to open the little accessories that come with the dolls. Do you know how small a Bratz doll hair brush is? It’s so small that some Bratz dolls come with microscopes. That’s how small one is.

So if you factor in my straight-up, out-of-pocket expensive and add compensation for my emotional pain and suffering, I figure — again, conservatively — that Mattel and MGA owe me roughly $29.8 million.

I would be willing to accept half if the Mattel folks promise not to wrap the money.

Text Only

Local News

• City wants to buy weather radios for those without

  Phil Jones had been working on a construction project outside his house all day on May 22 and was unaware that a tornado watch had been issued. Once he was inside, though, his weather radio went off, and he learned that a warning had been issued.

  February 9, 2012 1 Photo

• Architects present preliminary JHS plans at community meeting

  Reaction appeared mostly supportive Thursday night among the roughly 50 people who attended a community meeting at which architects presented their preliminary site plans for the future combined Joplin High School and Franklin Technology Center.

  February 9, 2012 1 Photo

• Confessed shooter testifies against co-defendants in Pittsburg murder case

  Rickey Smith testified Thursday that as he came in the back door of Ryan Bailey’s home in Pittsburg with a 9 mm pistol in his hand, Bailey looked up from the couch in his living room.

  February 9, 2012

• School district’s proposed street-closing plan questioned

  Plans to close some streets near the proposed Joplin High School drew questions, including a challenge from a former Joplin mayor, during a public hearing this week.

  February 9, 2012

• Neosho council approves new golf cart contract

  The purchase of golf carts was back on the agenda this week for the Neosho City Council. City Attorney Steve Hays said there were errors in the financing terms that were part of a bid approved last month for the purchase of 55 gas-powered carts from E-Z-Go for $144,195, so the purchase of a new fleet was rebid.

  February 9, 2012

• Mike Pound: Spirit of competition evident during double-overtime game

  When I played basketball in high school, I played in several very close games.
  Now, some people who may have known me in high school are probably laughing right now and saying, “What Mike meant to say is that when he was in high school, he came very close to playing in some games.”

  February 9, 2012

• Mo. optometrist filed $40 million refund claim

  A southwest Missouri optometrist who filed a tax return claiming a $40 million refund has been sentenced to four years and three months in federal prison.

  February 9, 2012

• Okla. receives waiver from No Child Left Behind

  Oklahoma’s top education official reacted with glee Thursday with the announcement that the state is one of 10 states being granted a waiver from the federal No Child Left Behind law that requires students be proficient in reading and math by 2014 — but focused on getting students to “just pass the tests.”

  February 9, 2012

• Kan. House approves bipartisan redistricting bill

  Power in the Kansas House is likely to shift next year from rural parts of the state to the Kansas City area after members overwhelmingly approved a bipartisan bill Thursday for redrawing their districts.

  February 9, 2012

• Fugitive in 1993 British heist arrested in Ozark

  A man suspected of stealing about $1.5 million from a security van in England in 1993 has been arrested in southwest Missouri.

  February 9, 2012

• More Local News Headlines

© 2012 Community Newspaper Holdings, Inc. · CNHI Classified Advertising Network · CNHI News Service
Associated Press content © 2012. All rights reserved. AP content may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
Our site is powered by Zope. Some parts of our site may require you to download the Flash Player Plugin.
Privacy Policy | AP News Registry privacy policy
Advertiser Index

Events by eviesays.com

The Joplin Globe, Joplin, MO 117 E. Fourth Street Joplin, Missouri 64801